movies

5 anti-Valentines Day movies that will make you glad you're single.

For some, February 14 brings with it an opportunity to shower your beloved with love, affection, chocolates and flowers. 

For others, Valentine's Day is an event on the calendar best skipped entirely. But in the age of social media, viral campaigns and in-your-face advertising, it can be almost impossible to avoid, nudging and reminding you at every turn.

Sure, there's the whole 'Galentine's Day' thing, where a group of girlfriends get together to celebrate (rather than wallow in) their singledom. But that's... still a bit saccharine for some (ahem, us). 

Which is why, if you'd prefer to stick a fork in your eye than cover everything in love hearts and roses, we suggest switching on one of these decidedly un-romantic films that'll make you forget about passion, entanglements, secret admirers, love... and everything in between.

Enter: five of the best anti-romance films to watch this Valentine's Day. You are so very welcome. 

Fresh.

Daisy Edgar-Jones in Fresh. Image: Searchlight Pictures.

If you've been on the dating scene lately, you're probably acutely tuned in to the fact that it's largely a baron wasteland full of d**k pics, unanswered messages and catfishing. Fresh sets out to squash the fairytale romance tropes by telling a tale of a meet-cute gone very wrong. 

Noa (Daisy Edgar-Jones) is sick of the dating apps but is given new hope when she meets Steve (Sebastian Stan) in a grocery store. When she finally thinks she's cracked the whole dating game thing, Noa begins to make some unsavoury discoveries about her new beau. 

Now look, we've all turned a blind eye when we've started to see some red flags, but your new boyfriend having a penchant for cannibalism is kinda hard to ignore.

If you've hit pause on the dating apps out of frustration and fatigue, Fresh might just keep you off them for a little while longer. It's probably for the best.

You can stream Fresh on Disney+.

The Menu.

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Anna Taylor-Joy and Ralph Fiennes in The Menu. Image: Searchlight Pictures.

Bad dates. We've all had them, right? Sometimes I wake in a cold sweat thinking about some of the disaster rendezvous I've had to endure — but I don't think anything could ever compare to the s**t show that unfolds in the film The Menu.

Margot (Anya Taylor-Joy) is invited along on a date with Tyler (Nicholas Hoult) to enjoy a once-in-a-lifetime fine dining experience hosted by one of the top chefs of the world (Ralph Fiennes) on a (super creepy) remote island. As the food service begins, a chaotic series of gruesome, gory events unfolds and all is not as it seems.

Let it be known, this is not an easy watch — you'll be squeamish from start to end — but it's such a brilliant movie that gives a lovely middle finger to every s**t date you've ever been on.

You can stream The Menu on Disney+.

Ready or Not.

Samara Weaving in Ready or Not. Image: Searchlight Pictures.

If you're in the anti-romance mood perhaps a perfect wedding day gone really, really, wrong is just the ticket for you. Grace (Samara Weaving) has just married the man of her dreams only to find that her new in-laws are not as they seem.

On her wedding night happiness quickly turns to horror as Grace is told she must now play a deadly game of hide and seek and her life is on the line if she loses. Jam-packed with suspense - and laughs to boot - Ready or Not is a fun take on the gore genre with a great ensemble cast pushing it through.

There's violence, bloodshed and lot's of reasons to hate love in this film. 

You can stream Ready or Not on Disney+.

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Get Out.

Allison Williams and Daniel Kaluuya in Get Out. Image: Universal Pictures.

Ever dated someone only to find out they're not at all who you thought they were? In Jordan Peele's groundbreaking directorial debut, Get Out tells the story of Chris (Daniel Kaluuya) who is heading away for the weekend with his girlfriend Rose (Allison Williams) to meet her parents for the first time.

It's a scenario plenty of us have been in before, but perhaps none have turned out quite as horrifically as this. This film offers searing commentary on racism through the lens of a terrifying horror story (with a little bit of very dark humour thrown into the mix).

Get Out is full of subtext that will get you thinking outside of the confines of social constructs. And it'll most likely make you never, ever want to meet your future significant other's parents.

You can stream Get Out on Netflix.

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The Favourite.

Olivia Colman and Rachel Weisz in The Favourite. Image: Searchlight Pictures.

If you'd like to feel better about being unattached, why not watch a feature film with seething jealousy at its core? The Favourite is set in 18th-century England, where a lowly maid (Emma Stone) weasels her way into the companionship of Queen Anne (Olivia Colman), much to the chagrin of Lady Sarah Churchill (Rachel Weisz).

This competitive triangle leads to a wickedly devious game of tit-for-tat complete with bed hopping, evil plotting, poisoned tea and deceit. The Favourite is a dark comedy for sure, but it's also a devastating look at the complexities of womanhood and friendship.

Colman took home the Academy Award for Best Actress in 2019 for this one, so it's safe to say it's some of her best work. You won't feel any giddy feelings of love after watching this one but you will see three powerhouse actresses in at the top of their game.

You can stream The Favourite on Netflix or Disney+.

Feature image: Searchlight Pictures.

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